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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25127116">Call For Help</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samunderthelights/pseuds/Samunderthelights'>Samunderthelights</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Zalex Week 2020 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>13 Reasons Why (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Depression, Don't copy to another site, Hurt / Comfort, M/M, Post-Canon, Suicidal Thoughts, Trauma, Zalex, Zalexweek2020, no one dies, zalexweek2k20</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-07-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-07-07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-04 09:48:51</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,559</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25127116</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Samunderthelights/pseuds/Samunderthelights</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex has been trying his best to cope with what he did to Bryce, but enough is enough, and when he finds himself ready to end the pain once and for all, he knows that there is only one person he can reach out to for help.</p><p>---</p><p>Zalex Week 2K20 : Day 1 - Hurt / Comfort</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Zach Dempsey &amp; Alex Standall, Zach Dempsey/Alex Standall</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Zalex Week 2020 [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1820161</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>47</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Zalex Week 2k20</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Call For Help</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hi!</p><p>I only found out about Zalex Week 2020 this morning, so I'm a little behind with my stories. But I love the idea, and I really want to participate, so I'm trying my best to write a story every day, and let's pretend they are not posted too late, eh? O=)<br/>Enjoy!</p><p>XX</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  
</p><p> </p><p>“Please, Zach, help me.”</p><p>Zach had been asleep when he had gotten Alex’s call, but as soon as he had heard his words, he had jumped out of bed, ready to do whatever he could do to help. He had asked him, begged him to tell him what was going on, but Alex’s words hadn’t made much sense, and in the end Zach hadn’t gotten much more out of him than where he was right now.</p><p>So Zach had jumped in his car, and he had made his way over to the bridge as quickly as possible, but with every minute that went by, he began to realize more and more what it meant that Alex was out there on his own in the middle of the night. With every minute, he felt like he would be too late, and there would be nothing he could do for his best friend.</p><p>But when he jumps out of his car, he finds Alex still standing there, the tears streaming down his face, a blank stare in his eyes as he is looking down at the water.</p><p>“What are you doing out here?” Zach asks, but he already knows the answer. “What happened?”</p><p>“I killed him, Zach,” Alex says, and although Zach has known this for months, years now, it still makes him feel sick to have it put to him so matter-of-factly. “I ended his life.”</p><p>“You didn’t mean to.”</p><p>“Didn’t I?” Alex asks, looking up from the water, straight into Zach’s eyes. “I wanted him dead.”</p><p>“We all did, but…”</p><p>“I fucking killed him, Zach!” Alex spits out. “How am I meant to just… how the fuck do I get to live my life, knowing what I did to him?”</p><p>“Would you rather spend the rest of your life in prison?”</p><p>“Maybe. It wouldn’t be any worse than this, would it?” Alex admits. “I don’t know how to… it’s in here, all the time,” he tries to explain, as he hits himself in the head. “Every time I close my eyes, I see his face, Zach.”</p><p>“I know.”</p><p>“No, you don’t. You have no idea what it’s like!”</p><p>“I do, Alex,” Zach reassures him, and Alex is about to object, but when he sees the guilty look in his eyes, he realizes that he is not just saying it. “I know how it feels, okay?”</p><p>“We shouldn’t have gotten away with it.”</p><p>“No, maybe not. But he got away with everything he did, didn’t he?” Zach asks. “Do we really deserve to rot away, because of…”</p><p>“He died,” Alex interrupts him, more tears beginning to fall from his eyes. “There is no fixing that, or trying to make it up to him. He’s fucking gone!”</p><p>“I know that, Alex. But how is killing yourself going to bring him back, huh?” Zach asks. “That’s why you’re here, right?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Alex admits, as he looks back down at the water. “Maybe. I’m tired, Zach. I don’t sleep, I can’t eat… I don’t want to do this anymore.”</p><p>“Why didn’t you tell me before? Does Charlie know?”</p><p>“Yeah, he knows,” Alex scoffs.</p><p>“And?”</p><p>“We broke up. Apparently he didn’t mind me having killed someone, as long as we didn’t talk about it, but the second I tried to bring it up…”</p><p>Zach can see the pain written all over his best friend’s face, how he is beginning to shiver, so he pulls him in for a hug, wanting nothing more than to make things better for him. But he doesn’t know how to.</p><p>“I’m sorry, man. If I had known…”</p><p>“What? You would have told him not to dump me?”</p><p>“We could have talked about it,” Zach sighs. “I should have known it had gotten this bad.”</p><p>“Yeah, well…”</p><p>“I was too fucked up to notice,” Zach realizes, as he lets go of Alex. “I am so sorry, Alex. I should have been there for you.”</p><p>“I can’t do this anymore,” Alex admits. “I don’t know how to live with it.”</p><p>“You have to.”</p><p>“But I don’t, do I?” Alex asks, the question lingering in the air for the longest time, before Zach finally breaks the silence.</p><p>“Let me help you,” he whispers, struggling to fight his tears, the thought of Alex wanting to die too much to bear. “Please.”</p><p>“I am tired, Zach.”</p><p>“I know, but we can do this, okay? Together. But I can’t do this without you,” Zach admits. “I need you, man.”</p><p>“You really don’t.”</p><p>“Yeah, I do. I fucking love you, and if you do this…,” Zach tries, but his voice breaks, and he can no longer fight his tears. “Please let me help you,” he tries again, but when Alex looks back down at the water, a feeling of dread washes over him.</p><p>“What if it never gets any better?”</p><p>“It will. But you need to give yourself a chance. If you die tonight… think about what it will do to your parents, to your friends… think about Charlie,” Zach says, but he can tell that he has said the wrong thing.</p><p>“Charlie doesn’t care. Not anymore.”</p><p>“Well, I do, okay? More than you know.”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Yeah.” Zach nods. “But that’s not a conversation to have right now,” he chuckles uncomfortably. “But we all care, Alex. Don’t do this.”</p><p>Alex gives a small, but unconvinced nod, and Zach is still half-expecting him to change his mind. But instead, he sighs, before awkwardly staring down at his feet.</p><p>“I’m sorry.”</p><p>“No, I get it. I know how you’re feeling, okay? Why do you think I almost drank myself to death? I couldn’t face everything that had happened. But it didn’t fix anything. And this… it’s not going to fix anything either. You know what happened after Hannah died, right?”</p><p>Alex nods, a guilty look on his face, but Zach can see how tired, how broken he is. So he wraps his arms around him, and he holds him for the longest time, before pressing a kiss into his hair and letting go of him.</p><p>“You’re going to be okay.”</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>“Will you stay with me?” Alex asks, after Zach has dropped him off home. “Please?”</p><p>“Yeah, of course.” Zach nods, and without another word, he follows Alex into the house.</p><p>The Standalls are still up, completely oblivious to what had almost just happened, and when they see Alex and Zach, they both flash a big smile.</p><p>“Zach! What a surprise!”</p><p>“Zach is staying here tonight,” Alex explains, trying to hide the fact that he is still shivering. “Is that okay?”</p><p>“Of course. It’s great to see you again!”</p><p>“Thanks. You too.” Zach smiles, before quickly following Alex upstairs.</p><p>“It’s weird, being back here,” Alex admits, an uncomfortable look on his face.</p><p>“What happened?”</p><p>“I kept missing classes, I started having panic attacks… I’ll go back, I think. But I just couldn’t do it,” Alex explains, but just the fact that he is planning on going back, it makes Zach breathe a sigh of relief. Because if he is making plans, that means that maybe, just maybe, he is planning on sticking around after all.</p><p>“I meant what I said out there, Alex. You are going to be okay.”</p><p>“I doubt it. It’s never going to go away, is it?” Alex whispers, fully aware of the fact that his parents are still downstairs. “How am I supposed to learn to just live with it?”</p><p>“I don’t know,” Zach admits. “But we’ll figure it out.”</p><p>Alex nods, looking even more tired than he did before, and only here in the light of his bedroom, can Zach truly see how ashen his skin has gotten, how his eyes seem to have lost its sheen, his hair its color.</p><p>“You should try and get some sleep.”</p><p>“I told you, I can’t sleep.”</p><p>“Try anyway,” Zach says, and Alex looks like he is about to object, but then he decides against it.</p><p>He climbs into bed, and without saying a word, Zach climbs in next to him. He brushes his hand through Alex’s hair, before presses a kiss against his forehead, wanting nothing more than for him to be the boy he once knew again.</p><p>“What you said…”</p><p>“I said a lot.”</p><p>“You know what I mean,” Alex whispers, and Zach does know. “Did you mean it?”</p><p>“Yeah, I did. You mean a lot to me, Alex,” Zach admits. “Too much, maybe.”</p><p>“I <em>did </em>kiss you, so…”</p><p>“I definitely remember that,” Zach chuckles, his hand still lingering on the back of Alex’s neck. “It took me a little longer to realize though.”</p><p>“I’m sorry,” Alex whispers. “About tonight. For calling you.”</p><p>“I’m not. I’m glad you called me. If you hadn’t…”</p><p>“Don’t.”</p><p>They both know what Zach was going to say though, and it brings tears of shame to Alex’s eyes. He is too tired to fight them, so he simply closes his eyes, and he lets himself be pulled into Zach’s arms, the warmth, and Zach’s tight grip around him, making him feel safer than he has felt in months, if not years.</p><p>“Go to sleep,” Zach whispers, before pressing another kiss into Alex’s hair. “I’ll stay with you.”</p><p>“Zach?”</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>Zach tightens the grip on Alex, wanting, needing to feel him. Needing to know he is safe in his arms, that he did not lose him tonight.</p><p>“Thank you.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Tumblr : https://samunderthelights.tumblr.com/</p></blockquote></div></div>
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